Still Pam

If I told you I had a memory problem would you look at me differently? Would you shy away from me? What if I told you I had a broken arm? Would you avoid me or would you offer to help?  It’s different; but it isn’t.  You may know that I struggle with memory issues. Heck, that’s the basis for my blog, right? I try to pepper my blog with memory tidblits as well as other mommy things that pop into my head and my life. But, I can’t ignore the obvious. I struggle, people. It’s always there: the forgetting.

To be sure, I’m still me; just forgetful.  I like to laugh, I get mad (not too often), I love the wiggles, I read, and I forget. I’ve been to countless doctor’s appointments and prolly two years in, I still don’t have resolution, but I keep on plugging.  It’s prolly not early onselt alzheimer’s although i am on the same meds that those patients take. i feel it helps. in my gut i think it’s thyroid, cuz i have all of the symptoms, but none of the right blood levels. nonetheless, i dont CARE what the diagnosis is. OK actually I DO care, but you know what i mean, right?

I want a name for it. that way i can plan. cuz planning’s what i do. i’ve been living in a sort of limbo for a while now and i hate it. HATE it.  i can’t work full time because of my issues, plus i spend so much time running to appointments that what job would give me the time off? I need answers. Once I have an answer, then i can move forward. If it’s thryoid, then i can find the right dose of meds and feel better (hopefully). if its something more malicious then i can make plans for my kids’ future.

the not knowing is killing me.

meanwhile, i’m still me. don’t shy away from me because i’m forgetful or moody or something. it’s not contagious.

Regarding Queen of Everything

Her highness is still queen of planet blortnick and also a MODEL.

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