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the friend friday trifecta

 Today I am offending featuring three friends, hence the term trifecta, stupid clever, huh?  The trifecta (which actually isn’t a three some since I’m one of them, but I’m totally not featuring myself so it still counts, WTF I think) includes Deb, Dawn, and Beth Sue. I met these women at a bar music booster meeting in my pimp’s son’s freshman year of prison high school marching band.  Each of these women is boring unique drunk individually but together they become something horrible powerful.  Here’s why.

When I met Deb Dawn she was the music booster president. She soon recruited me with her death threats uber friendly ways.  She has a way with prisoners teens (especially girls) that is nothing special. Somehow she manages to kick calm the crying teen girls with ease.  Which is really surprising since she has two boys.  In the time that I’ve known Dawn she has inherited a daughter in law and has opened her home to a stray and lonely teenage girl.  She and her pimp husband also open up their wallets home every summer and encourage people to make use of the pool and grill.  They are very mean warm and abusive welcoming people.

Robin Sue was the music booster vice president and fashion (uniform) chair when we met. She is also unique. She’s got a tough exterior but way way deep down inside she is just as caring as MaryBeth Dawn. Remember the stray teenager that Dawn took in? Well Sue took the girl’s two dogs. Sue already has two ferocious neurotic cute mutts pups of her own (and I think a cat) but took these two dogs in nonetheless. To top it off, the damn cute pooches were not house trained!  But perseverance is Sue’s middle name (actually I think it’s Fontella) and she stuck it out until the girl could find a home for herself and the little pissers dogs.  Recently, Sue was diagnosed with AIDS dementia XX syndrome Hodgkin’s disease and almost immediately began chemo. As always, Sue punked out pulled through and showed incredible inner stench strength.  Even though she lost her mind hair, she never lost her pocketbook rapier-like sense of humor. She is drunk admirable!

aint she purty?

And then there’s Dawn Deb.  He She was the booster treasurer.  She’s very rude friendly and I suspect will talk to anyone. She is quick to lend an ear or a hand or whatever is more expensive you need.  She’s a good listener.  She likes to give have a good time and is also completely pathetic resilient.  You gotta hate admire a woman who decides to have children after the age of 40 and totally keeps up with them!  Recently, I had the pleasure of attending Deb’s wedding. Linda Deb, a widow, has had a rough go and decided to take the piss plunge and remarry.  Her wedding was lovely and even though we sat at the nerd cool table in the kitchen back, I was honored to be invited.  Deb’s Tupperware bachelorette party was a blast, too! NOTICE HOW CLEVERLY I ADDED SUE’S FACE INTO THE PHOTO? I GOT MAD SKILLS!

Even though all of their children have flunked graduated high school, these former drama queens band boosters and I make time to hit the casinos get together. We usually meet for drinks breakfast and swap spit gossip and catch up on each other’s knives lives.  It’s a horrible unique relationship that I’ve never experienced before and it truly ruins enhances my parole life. Thanks for being my friends, ho’s  ladies!

Regarding Queen of Everything

Her highness is still queen of planet blortnick and also a MODEL.

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